Where Did September Go?

Is it really Ocrober already? How did that happen? The last few weeks have been so busy... the last days of summer and swimming, Caleb's dedication (I'll have to post about that- it was awesome!), D is teaching a class for the fall semester, fall festivals (Andrew got to ride in the parade in one of the squad cars this year), making s'mores in the backyard, the start of the hockey season, lots of homework, flu shots, and the first cold of the season (comes early here in the Midwest).

Ashley and Riley enjoy the last day of swimming with friends


Riley and her cool butterfly face painting she had done at the JDRF walk

Caleb did NOT like the loud sirens during the parade


Caleb LOVES motorcycles, so this ride thrilled him!

Dennis thought it would be a great idea to send me on this ride with the kids (it was called the tornado and yes, I am deathly afraid of tornados- Robin, you would have tossed your cookies for sure!). Clearly, this is a before picture.

Andrew rode in the squad car in the parade



The fire looks like it is about to burn Caleb up, but I promise you, it was perfectly safe!

Caleb does not see the sense in waiting to roast the marshmellows!

Snakes!

Here's a first for Caleb I have not been anxiously awaiting...

First time holding a snake.

Grandpa F. took the boys to a snake show recently. This picture really captures Caleb's enthusiasm for snakes, don't you think?

Glad that first is over with and I never had to watch it!

NOW PLAYINGTo Russia with love 1:29

Mute the music below and check out this inspiring story of a teenage boy from MD, who was adopted from Krasnoyarsk as a baby (be sure to watch the CNN heroes link in the previous post as well). I pray that someday Caleb can have the same sentiment about the city and country where he spent the first two years of his life. We have always planned on bringing him back to visit when he turns 16, so this story really struck a chord in my heart and brought tears to my eyes.

NOW PLAYING
To Russia with love 1:29

NOW PLAYINGCNN Heroes: Alex Griffith 1:37

NOW PLAYING
CNN Heroes: Alex Griffith 1:37

JOY!

I was looking through some pictures today and was reminded of this one, which was taken last year on Caleb's first full day home. As soon as everyone was awake that morning, we all went outside to fill our pool (we had promised our girls while we were in Russia that would be the very first thing we would do when we returned home). I just love this picture, because it is the very first moment I had ever seen true JOY on my baby's face... and it was captured forever in a photograph.

What an awesome moment that was!

Time for a Date?

Last night in the car, D and I were trying to have a meaningful conversation. The kids were in the car, so this was not successful. Two of the kids were crying, one was singing at the top of his lungs, and the fourth child insisted on continually interrupting. My husband's response to this type of situation is usually to give up on the conversation between the two of us altogether and last night was no exception. This left me feeling frustrated, so after about 5 minutes of brooding I said,

"I need a date."

After a moment, D looked at me and in complete seriousness said,

"With who?"

Can't Wait to See This Movie!

This movie looks like it will be AMAZING! I can't wait to see it!

MANDISA - "He Is With You"

This is a truly inspiring song and video. Check it out...

The Sweetest of Firsts

Just wanted to share two really awesome things that have happened in the past week or two...

1) When we were in the parking lot a few days ago, Caleb reached for my hand and held it tightly all on his own. He even looked up at me with a big, sweet smile. This was the first time he has ever reached for my hand. For the past year, the parking lot has been a huge cause of contention between us, and I usually end up carrying him because he refuses to walk with me or hold my hand (he prefers to run at full tilt with reckless abandon). I have lived in daily fear of my son getting hit by a car for over a year now. Even if he continues to refuse to hold my hand in the future, at least I can hold on to the memory of C CHOOSING to happily and sweetly hold my hand in the parking lot.

2) Last week, C walked right up to me and out of the blue said, 'I love you, Mama" to me and looked right into my eyes with a big adorable smile on his face... he added to the sweetness of the moment by wrapping his arms around me and giving me a long, meaningful hug. This is the first time he has ever told me he loves me on his own. Talk about melting my heart!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Summer Wrap-Up

Ashley climbing again- her arm is all better!
Andrew at the park



Caleb loves to go down the slide!


A day at our local zoo- they just added an entire section called "Africa"

All of the kids were so excited to be so close to the giraffes

I love when I get a pic I like of all four!

The tigers were actually moving and roaring quite a bit

Awwww! I love this one ;0)

Andrew and Riley coming down the waterslide at a local waterpark

Andrew

Andrew

Riley

Andrew, Ashley, Eryn and Riley

Birthday morning- Ashley and Riley turned 7!

Andrew got a new hat

A & R decorated their own cakes- a birthday tradition

American Girl in Chicago- Ashley and Riley's birthday wish come true :0)

Riley with her first American Girl!

It was fun to have Grandma and Grandpa there!

Ashley and Riley at American Girl

Riley


We've had an awesome summer! I just cannot believe Caleb has already spent two summers here! What a blessing it is to watch our kids learn and grow.

It is also just a little sad sometimes :0)

School starts next week, so now it's time to get ready for a wild and VERY busy fall!

Stay tuned!

A New Light

Today, I spent some time organizing all of our random electronics stuff. As I was doing this, I realized we have never shown the girls the videos from our second trip to Russia last May/June. I also realized that D and I have never watched the video we took in Russia on our second trip. On top of that, we have never watched any of the video taken on our video camera since then. As soon as I mentioned that fact out loud to Ashley, she begged me to let her watch the videos, So, of course, we watched them.... Caleb included. I cannot believe we have never watched any of this footage before. Caleb has been home for more than a year, after all! The first year really was a blur. I'm so glad we got it all on video.

Just what have we been doing?!?!?!?!?

After watching the videos, I was amazed. We have been doing soooo much! God has really been here and moving! Wow! I truly had forgotten just what C was like back then. I can't tell you how many times our therapist has said, "whenever you're feeling discouraged, don't focus on the problems you are still having, focus on how far you have come". Sounds logical, but that is so hard to do! So many days over the past year, Caleb just hasn't seemed happy. Some days, he seemed to spend ALL of his energy just pushing me away. How exhausting for a little guy! I would often ask myself (and God), "How can I show him that I love him? How can I teach him what love even IS if he won't let me in?".

I have worried and prayed and I have worried and prayed some more. I know things would have been easier if I had not indulged in the worrying thing. The truth is, though, I am a human being, and parenting a post-institutionalized child is difficult, scary and confusing. I have parented 3 other children, but just about everything I know and everything I trusted flew out the window the day C came home. For the first 2 years of his life, C did not know love. He did not know trust. He did not know much comfort He did not know touch. Especially in his first few weeks of life, touch from a grown-up came only in the form of a stick of a needle or some other uncomfortable or painful thing. Survival for him meant not allowing himself to rely on others... not allowing himself to create a bond with someone who surely would be gone soon enough. We have spent the past year chiseling away, ever so slowly, at that thick protective layer. There have been times the layer I had just chipped off has regrown, and I have had to chip through it yet again. So many times, I honestly thought we would never get anywhere... that we had not moved forward much at all.

Little did I know, we were always moving forward... I was just so deeply engrossed in the fine details that I could not see the whole picture.

Well, today I saw it, and it was amazing. I can now see Caleb's progress in a new light. The little boy in the videos is no longer. He has been replaced by a little boy who can love and trust. Who WANTS to love and trust most of the time. He no longer separates himself in a world of his very own. I know we still have a lot of work to (patiently!) do, but I also know the contrast between then and now is striking.

Even when it seemed as though C was not embracing the love we were so desperately trying to give, Jesus was there. Despite all of our inadequacies as parents, He continued to love us and gently guide us. He also continued to open C's heart. I know we often veered onto the wrong path, and that we will continue to do more of the same. Despite all of that, He will always gently nudge us back onto the path He would have for us to follow.

I am so glad we watched those videos today.

"God is our refuge and strength,
An ever-present help in trouble"
Psalms 46:1

Paka, Crib!

Well, it has finally happened...

Caleb is officially out of his crib and out of our room. He finally decided he was ready, and he has slept through the night for several nights now. I didn't blog about it at first because I didn't want to jinx it :0) Anyway, some of you may notice the sports pillowcase and wonder why it doesn't look loke he is sleeping in his bed. Well, that's because it isn't his bed...

... it's Andrew's bottom bunk. I'm pleased to report both brothers are thrilled with the arrangement and Mommy is doing just fine. The binky is next on our list!!!!!

Fun

Well, we've been having a lot of fun this summer! Here's some pics from last weekend. We spent some time with friends fishing, shooting (big boys only), and hanging out. The kids had a blast. See if you can spot something not so fun in the pictures. I'll give you a clue.... we had a broken bone incident with one of our kids about two weeks ago. Look back over the pictures and see if you can spot just who.

Six Flags Trip

I'm finally getting our Six Flags pics on here... These are from 2 weeks ago. We drove to St. Louis for a day with friends and really had a great time! Our kids are fearless- especially Caleb. I truly believe he would go on any ride in the park if he could :0)

Ordinary Miracles

Being a Mommy is truly the most amazing gift.

For a short time, I get to see everything through the eyes of a child... and it is incredible. A child's perspective helps me to see the beauty of God's creation and His blessings all around me.

Nothing is ordinary through the eyes of a child.

Just today, for example, my youngest son gasped and squealed with glee when he saw how tall our corn had grown. I know if he hadn't been there, I honestly wouldn't have thought much of it. To be completely honest, I was worrying about financial issues at the very moment he was telling me to look at the corn.

This afternoon, my oldest son exclaimed, "Hey! That cloud looks just like the Nike symbol" as we drove out of our neighborhood. If he hadn't been with me, I probably wouldn't have even noticed that the sky had clouds in it...or that the sky was such a beautiful and brilliant blue... I was too busy worrying about getting to our destination on time.

A few weeks ago, we were tracing one another with sidewalk chalk on the driveway. It was my turn to get traced. As I was lying there on the warm concrete, one of my daughters said, "Mommy, don't the sun and breeze together feel amazing when you close your eyes and relax?". I really wanted to go inside and make dinner, but I forced myself to close my eyes and relax. She was right, it DID feel amazing

Everyday, my four children remind me to stop and pay attention to the truly important things.

Thank you, Lord, for the blessing of my beautiful children. May the lessons I have learned from them stay with me always.

Something to Think About

This family is truly inspiring...

Promo for "We Have Room" Documentary from David Watson on Vimeo.

Sparklers!

This was the first year we have bought sparklers for the kids. In the past, D worked at night, so sparklers were out of the question. I'm sure it had something to do with the very scary combo of multiple young children + fire + Mommy all alone. This year, D was home for the Fourth of July (hooray!) and the kids got what they have been begging for all along. All in all, they got to indulge for three nights in a row! Dreams really DO come true :0) :0) :0) :0)

God Bless America!

Happy Fourth of July! What a blessing it is to live here in this country! Here's Caleb wishing America a happy birthday. No matter how many times he tried, he just could NOT say all 3 words in a row. In the end, he opted to leave out the word "birthday" in the middle. So cute!