Friday, October 24, 2008

Fall Fun!

Just wanted to add a few pics for the picture hungry... These were actually taken 2 weeks ago- we went to a farm to pick apples and select some pumpkins- we had a blast :0) C and Beans fell in love with a kitten there and he kept them entertained for quite some time. We even went for pumpkin pie blizzards after- YUM!!!!! C loved every second of it! Sadly, the weather is already turning too cold to have this kind of outdoor fun, so I'll just have to reminisce :0( D just told me we may have snow flurries this weekend!!!!!




Tuesday, October 21, 2008

A Gift Like None Other

I have not written much about my son's birthmother before, but I think about her just about everyday. My heart often aches for her. I often wonder what she is doing now. Is she missing him? I cannot even begin to imagine having to give up my child.

When we were in the region in Russia where our son was born, my mind was very focused on her. I was very aware that, at any given moment, she could be standing right next to us and we would never even know it. When we had C with us, I would wonder if she would know him if she saw him. I'm fairly certain she would have. There were- and still are- so many thoughts and questions I have about her... questions that will never be answered... questions C will likely have one day. I have wrestled with, and come to accept, the lack of knowing. This is, after all, how God has planned for it to be. Someday C will have to wrestle with and accept the same questions without answers. I pray for C daily. That he will be able to understand that his birth mother gave him an incredible gift- she gave him the gift of life. This is one thing we do know. It is a fact that cannot be disputed. Today, as I was holding C close, that truth became so real to me. I could feel his soft cheek, rubbing against mine, and I could hear his rhythmic breathing as he relaxed in my arms. I can't imagine C NOT being our son. I can't imagine him NOT being here. She could have chosen a different outcome. I don't think I fully realized the gravity of that fact until today.

Thank you, Lord, for opening my eyes to the truth.
Thank you, Lord, for the young woman on the other side of the world,
who gave birth to our son.
Please hold her close and open her heart to the warmth of your love.

Thank you, C's birthmother, for choosing life for our son.
It is a gift like none other...

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Ash has a boyfriend!

Relax, Grandmas, it's not what you think...

At bedtime tonight, I was in the hallway on my way to the bathroom to check on my girls (they are 6 years old) when I heard this conversation:

Ash: "You know B likes K and he wants to be her boyfriend" (my ears perked up right away).
Beans: "I know. But she doesn't want to go out with him" (Wow, where does this stuff come from?).
Ash: "Well, he told EVERYONE he is in love with her" (I was now hurrying to set the conversation straight).

I tried to appear casual as I entered the bathroom...

Me: "You girls are too young to be in love. You have to be grownups to have a boyfriend."
Ash (totally serious): "We know that, Mom! I'm only in love with one boy!"
Me: "You are? (I was preparing to give Ash a big lecture) Who?"
Ash: "Daddy!"

With that, she flashed me a huge grin and skipped into her room.

I didn't have the heart to tell her Daddy is already taken :0)

Tuesday, October 07, 2008

Praise God For Grass Stains

I just came upstairs from doing the boys' laundry and I feel like I was stuck down there FOREVER!!!! It usually doesn't take me very long to do their laundry because their clothes are almost all dark colors and they are both fairly neat eaters. But today was different...
I spent a lot of time pre-treating their clothes today. By the time I got to the fifth or sixth pair of pants, I noticed a theme: grass stains. Then I sifted through the piles and discovered plenty more where that came from! My first reaction was frustration. I started to wonder when I would actually get to go to bed. I'm ashamed to say my mind swirled with negative thoughts about laundry and lack of sleep. Then all of a sudden, my thoughts shifted, and I remembered sitting with a mom of a little boy who was in my son's class last year. We were on a field trip and we were sitting on a bench, watching our boys wrestle one another in the grass. She had the sweetest smile on her face as she watched them. Then she turned to me and said, "I just love when he (motioning to her son) comes home with grass stains. I'm sure he'll have some today". Before I could ask her if she was feeling O.K., she explained, "He was pretty sick the first few years of his life, so I never had to clean grass stains off of his pants back then".
I had forgotten all about that comment until tonight. The memory of it sure did turn my thoughts around... Wow! How awesome! She was and is so right. Those grass stains mean my boys are healthy and strong! Thank you, Lord! On top of that, C has probably never had grass stains on his pants before. It may seem silly, but I teared up just thinking about it.

Lord, thank you for my beautiful children- all of them.
Thank you for their health.
Thank you for filling their hearts with the joys of childhood.
Thank you for giving C to our family.
Thank you for giving him the chance to be a normal little boy.
Thank you for the reminder- I needed it.
Thank you for blessing me with the awesome job of being C's Mommy.
Amen